This month, Aquatramp 2.0 turns one year old. As time marches on, I increasingly realize that time isn’t linear. It is more orbital than anything else. People, places, and things in time all become orbiting. Life happens, and we hear the old saying, “You can never go home.” Much of that is true. Most of us can physically go home, but as we travel, we change. Our values and prejudices adapt to the things we experience. As a sailor, I know that time and tide wait for no man. I also know that a rising tide lifts all boats. Time and water are the most valuable things I can think of. So, on the cusp of Aquatramp’s one year, I’ve changed the profile on the major social media accounts to reflect a paraphrased note I jotted down many years ago.
“AQUATRAMP is about travel, food, art, people, sailboats, and thermonuclear protection at the axis of good and evil.”
Take time to tip your glass to your own timeline. Make the most out of each moment. Feed your values and challenge your prejudices.
On this Earth Day, we are simply taking a day to stop and think. Trying is hard. Usually, the right things to do are hard.
We participate in the organized beach and waterway clean ups. We use long-lasting grocery bags. We even reduce shopping trips to conserve fuel. But, there’s always more I can do. Green is a business model. I’m talking about the lifestyle model. It’s tough to find real reviews on products. I don’t want a better warranty. I want a better product that lasts longer.
As a kid, I worked at a famous fast food chain. The owner had a catchphrase, “time to lean, time to clean.” Simple yet enough. Happy Earth Day.
The hay day of air travel is long since gone. I can remember when Pan Am and TWA ruled the skies. They were large and in charge airlines. In fact, they were so large that the man stepped in to fix what they saw as a problem. Some airlines were forced to split, while others merged to stay in business.
Back in the day, the 747s were kings. No one was worried about overhead space or queuing in line nut to butt to get on the plane. The snacks were full meals. The blankets were given out freely by flight attendants. There was enough room between rows that, as hard as little Billy tried, he couldn’t kick your seat.
However, there was an opposite side of the coin. Planes had smoking sections and mysterious folks like DB Cooper. It wasn’t as cheap to fly back then, either. The average American family would usually drive the family station wagon to their favorite vacation spot. You probably got the “way back” seat if you were the runt.
So here we are in a world of crowded overhead space and the crazy person sitting next to you trying to take a picture of your girlfriend’s toes. What can we do?
Here are Five suggestions for Airport Etiquette that may lighten the load and anxiety of being in the airport.
#5 Carry-on Bags
Speaking of lightening up the load, I’ve seen numerous people who have packed so much stuff in their carry-on that they can’t lift it into the overhead compartments. It never fails. Some good-hearted passengers are always there to help.
Advice: Stop being an enabler. Don’t reward bad behavior because those passengers will repeat their actions and create a time warp with others getting on and off the plane. They can check that kitchen sink at the gate.
#4 Walking through the airport
La la-la la-la… with no care in the world is how some families act in busy airports. Recently, I noticed five family members walking side by side in Atlanta. Seriously. They were holding up people who were obviously hurrying to catch a flight. Don’t get me wrong; a lot of the fault goes to the airports and airlines who book 12-minute layovers on the other side of the airport.
Advice: If you are a large number of humans, be aware of your footprint and be prepared to let others get by. Conversely, be vocal if you are trying to walk by in a hall or down the escalator with these types of travelers. Some people simply don’t know how the world works outside their 1-mile radius.
#3 Dogs
Not everyone is a dog person. There, I said it.
Advice: Keep stinky Cujo nearby and away from people who are trying to be polite.
#2 Behaviors
Stop hassling flight attendants because they are only going to get pissed and take it out on the rest of us. I guarantee you will not win an argument with the flight crew. Most weekday travelers are either working stiffs, criminals, or both these days. Neither of us wants to delay getting to where we are going.
Advice: Have a drink after you get through security. Or two. Or whatever people do these days to chill out. Travel days are rarely fun. Embrace the suck.
#1 Luggage carousels
Please tell me why people must be so close to the luggage carousel that their shins are pressed against the rub rail. This is one action that makes me mean mug someone. Over 200 people are waiting on luggage. Do you think yours will be the first to be delivered down the conveyor?
Advice: Everyone take a few steps back. Be respectful. Chill. Decorate your luggage so it’s easy to identify. The carousel is a circle; your overpacked bags will be back around like a bad employee.
We hope these Five tips help or at least make you laugh because they are genuine and you caught yourself thinking the same thing. Now it’s your turn. What are some of your pet peeves at airports or on planes?
Captain G is a licensed Merchant Mariner who has sailed over 10k nautical miles. His early career took him to Iceland, Italy, and the Caribbean. Like most sailors, his hobbies include damn near anything around the water, cheap rum, and breaking tools. As a self-proclaimed foodie, Captain G plans to eat around the globe after retirement.
The famous Tabasco Factory and Museum are in a quiet corner of Louisiana on a 2,200-acre island named Avery Island. The island is on the top of a salt dome that some geologists claim is deeper than Mt Everest is tall.
I grew up in the part of the country where the spiciest thing on the kitchen table was ground black pepper in a cardboard cylinder from the local grocery store. It wasn’t until years later, at the age of 17, that I joined the US Navy and headed to Chicago for boot camp. That is my first memory of any hot sauce.
There it was, on the galley table in that iconic bottle. Recruits were snatching the bottle as fast as possible to splash on their blue scrambled eggs at breakfast. If you’re curious about the “blue” eggs, ask any sailor who served during the early 90s, and they’ll know. From there, I can’t remember many tables not having sauces nearby. Without it, I wouldn’t think of enjoying oysters, bloody marys, or pizza.
I recently traveled through Louisiana to Avery Island to visit the factory and museum. My first impression was how well the property calmly looked with fresh, manicured grounds. My second feeling was that this land has strong family ties with everyone working there—five generations, to be exact. Like most visitors, I read up on the company before arriving and decided to take a self-guided tour. (Here’s a personal disclaimer* Even though I sail across oceans, I still get lost walking across the street in traffic.) But Tabasco has a great tour that kept me from getting lost. Each stop is numbered with great details at each location. The peppers are grown, harvested, and barreled there on-site. Salt is used on top of the barrels in the process. Trust me on this part: if you have a keen sense of smell, prepare yourself before walking by a few of the many warehouses. That pepper will light you up and tickle your sinuses.
It’s easy to spend the better part of a day exploring the property. After my tour, I walked through the gift shop and grabbed a few items for the kitchen. Knowing that I still had a long drive ahead of me, I didn’t let the opportunity of eating at the Tabasco restaurant slip by. My only regret was I didn’t come fully prepared and wasn’t wearing my “eating pants.” Don’t act like you don’t know what eating pants are!
Louisiana has much to offer in terms of culinary experiences, from soft-shelled crabs to boudin and jambalaya. Just be careful and don’t let the rougarou get you if you say out too late! For great Tabasco® recipes go to Tabasco.com
Captain G is a licensed Merchant Mariner who has sailed over 10k nautical miles. His early career took him to Iceland, Italy, and the Caribbean. Like most sailors, his hobbies include damn near anything around the water, cheap rum, and breaking tools. As a self-proclaimed foodie, Captain G plans to eat around the globe after retirement.
Welcome to Aquatramp (2.0) You may remember Aquatramp from a few years ago. You may have been to one of our meet-ups. Or you may be new to the tribe. Here, you’ll find travel topics focused on destinations, food, and the chill vibe. But first, let’s back up a little. We’ve been on a two-year hiatus. During the height of the pandemic, we paused and deleted everything. During those two years, we focused on what Aquatramp is. The best way to describe it is an explorer lifestyle. It’s relative to who you are. A foodie wants to find unique food spots. A surfer wants to find that perfect break. A hiker seeks to find that zen stride and the granola bar hidden in the bottom of their day pack for the last 30 miles. Aquatramp isn’t one person because we all want to get out there and live our hobbies. Follow along this year as we aim to post 52 articles covering relevant topics about destinations, gear reviews, food, and people living their hobbies out loud. Where will 2024 take you?
“What is your fondest memory of Spanish Meatballs?”
Written by Captain G
A guy was sitting behind me on a bus to Lisbon, Portugal, and this pickup line was his final attempt to pick up a girl across the aisle.
But this isn’t where the story begins. Let us go back five weeks and 3600 nautical miles to Jacksonville, Florida, USA. The crew loaded stores onto a private yacht that would soon make its way across the Atlantic Ocean. The owner had asked a friend, who in return asked me to join the trans-Atlantic crossing. Four of us would be on the 47-foot sailboat during the voyage.
Every journey has its pulse. I have commented before that long-distance sailing is 90% boredom and 10% panic, but this trip was of note to be different.
The First Leg
Bermuda, Isle of Devils
After finally leaving the mainland and out of the sight of land, we had the perfect sail to Bermuda. Along the way, dolphins rode our bow waves, Gin and Tonics let us know before dinner would soon be ready each evening, and the stars, the night sky while at sea, always impresses.
The first leg took five days. We planned to stop long enough to replenish the fresh galley necessities. However, the weather had us cautious due to a hurricane possibly crossing our path.
The storm came and went while we made friends at places like the Swizzle Inn, listening to Bil Krauss’s talents and enjoying Dark and Stormy’s at The White Horse. This was the last time we would see land for the next thirteen and a half days. Next stop, Azore Islands.
Horta
Cold drinks, Whalebones, and more Friends
Horta, Faial, is a port city on the western part of the Archipelago of the Azores and a rite of passage for sailors making a west-to-east trans-Atlantic crossing. The first mission was to find a historic pub named Peter’s. The pub was serendipitous, with burgees lining the walls and ceiling, live music wafting out the front door, and beer flowing to yachtmen from around the world. We smiled, laughed, made more friends, and took turns buying drinks, but most importantly, we knew the accomplishment we achieved.
Sadly, it was time for a crew change with my close friend Dave flying back to the States for business. Dave is a sailor’s sailor; he is a racer. One who is always watching the wind and tweaking the sails to squeak out another fraction of a kt. I learn from Dave every time I sail with him.
“Uncle” Rick, Owner Tony, and I welcomed the new Brit on board for the final reach to Lagos, Portugal.
Land Ho!
Mainland Europe, Dryland
We arrived in Lagos during daylight hours and tied to a dock at a downtown marina. That night, Portugal won the World Cup. Horns blasted through the city after the win. I joined the festivities and helped the locals celebrate in a proper sailor manner. The following day, with a sizable hangover, I said my goodbyes to the crew and boarded a passenger bus heading to Lisbon. Sitting around me were travelers from different points of the compass. During the two-hour trip, I listened to a guy behind me try repeatedly to start a flirty conversation with a girl across the aisle. During the last fifteen minutes, he asked her the question that still makes me smile, “What is your fondest memory of Spanish meatballs?’
“Making new friends with guns.” Written by Captain G
Santo Domingo, Dominican Republic.
I woke rested and eager to get to the boat, but first thing first, breakfast! The hotel provided a traditional Caribbean breakfast with many fruits and juices, and I was in heaven. Looking like an American, I rushed into the lobby. With my aviator sunglasses covering my eyes and a piece of toast hanging out of my mouth, I darted for the main entrance to grab a taxi. Steps away from the door, I hear the concierge call out, “Capitan!”, “a message!”
Day Two, Track Four: 2018’s song, Nice For What by Drake
Waiting outside was my driver in what looked like a very well kept Louis Vuitton hat and a big smile from ear to ear. His task was to spend the day showing me the city of Santo Domingo until called to the marina. Our first stop was the Amber Museum, an educational location with many incredible pieces of… amber. Seeing historic insects and critters frozen in this hard sap was wild.
Day Two, Track Five: Let Me Ride That Donkey by 69 Boyz
The second stop was at the county’s capital building. It seemed my driver knew everyone in the city. We found a restaurant across the street and had lunch with a few of the guards. We headed onward with a full belly of Locrio de Pollo and a few Presidente cervezas to wash it down. Then, the next stop was something I would never have imagined and honestly didn’t know existed in the Dominican Republic.
The Faro a Colon, Christopher Columbus Lighthouse. It could be the famous or infamous explorers’ final resting place. A tomb with what I can describe as a seafarer’s chest sits encircled at the intersection of a massive cruciform. Inside the chest are the ashes that some say are ol’ Chris. Each October, the chest is opened briefly to reveal the contents.
Day Two, Track Six: 2019’s song La Romana by Bad Bunny feat. El Alfa
As the sun was setting, I was under the impression that the boat would once again not be arriving, if there was even a boat at all.
Intermission… enjoy the track Unforgettable from French Montana featuring Swae Lee.
The sun dipped behind the mountains, and Leo, the driver, had an outdoor sports bar in mind for a few cold beers off the clock. Thunder rumbled in the distance as we walked up and grabbed a picnic table outside. This storm plays a vital role later in the night. The smell of food grilling nearby teases my appetite. Halfway through the first beer, the rain hit, and we ran for the Escalade! “I know where we’ll go,” Leo said as we pulled out of the parking lot.
Track Ocho: 2017’s Swalla by Jason Derulo feat. Nicki Minaj
Trash is a dirty word, and there is a lot of it. Have you ever been out in the middle of nowhere, thinking that you must be the first person to step foot in that spot, absorbing the breathtaking view and then looking down to see an empty Red Bull can, a cigarette butt, or an old bald tire?
When was the last time you volunteered? That’s not a question meant to be mean but more of a question to start a conversation about Clean Water. If you add Clean Water plus Volunteering plus Exercise, divide by the number of Friends, and carry the two… well, you get where this is going, right?
As a sea captain, I see many things floating around on the ocean surface. The three things I see the most frequently are birthday balloons, Gatorade-type plastic bottles (not really water bottles as much lately), and jet skis. Just kidding about the jet skis; I knew my friend Omar would get a kick out of that jab. But the third object would be plastic shopping bags. All of those things float around longer than folks may think.
Smart people do “smart” things. The same formula applies to trashy people: they do “trashy” things. Not all flotsam and jetsam come from the folks having a good time along the beach. Many floating debris come from miles away, upstream from the rivers, creeks, and lakes we enjoy. Sadly, a good rain will introduce a wave of fresh junk each time.
5 Things: Volunteering
Here are a few organizations we feel do good in areas we play and work in.
–St. Johns Riverkeeper in Jacksonville, Florida, is a non-profit organization and a voice, advocate, and watchdog for the St. Johns River, which flows for 310 miles in Florida. Fun Fact: The St Johns River flows North.
–Miami Waterkeeper is based in Miami. They are a non-profit organization that advocates for South Florida’s watershed and wildlife.
–Clean Miami Beach is dedicated to keeping the community and natural habitats free of garbage and harmful pollutants with a focus on single-use plastics.
–Bayou City Waterkeeper is a Houston, Texas-based organization focusing on water quality, wetlands protection, and flood mitigation.
–Bill Baggs State Park in Key Biscayne is part of the Florida State Parks. Minutes from downtown Miami, this park hosts weekend cleanups. The park has gorgeous views of nature and even a lighthouse with tours.
Honorable mention- If being out in the sun isn’t your thing, or you prefer to volunteer in a different way, consider a floating hospital.
They send hospital ships filled with volunteer professionals who selfishly provide life-changing surgeries each year. Where do they sail to? Here’s the link.
Key West is known for many things. Sailors may think of it as “Race Week.” Vacationers may consider it a destination where one can visit everything within walking distance. RVers probably consider it a place to visit on a day trip or a turnaround spot at the end of US 1. For us, Key West is so much more. Here are our five things to do while visiting The Conch Republic.
If you attended public school, you know what a Sloppy Joe is. And who doesn’t like a good Sloppy Joe sandwich now and then? Now imagine that with live music and booze. Sounds pretty good? We think so. We visit Sloppy Joe’s Bar every time we visit KW and tell ourselves it’s for good luck. Try the sandwich at least once. Text your friends back home to look you up online with the restaurant’s live webcam. Smile and make a toast.
The iconic bouy is located at 1400 Whitehead St. (24.551294 x -81.80104)
A historical landmark called the Southernmost Point of the Continental United States. At this point, you are closer to Cuba than a Walmart. It is an excellent spot for that vacation photo opportunity, and you should expect a waiting line for this free memory. For fun, take along a Polaroid Camera. For reference, this bouy is near the southern end of Duval Street. A walking route option is to stroll along US 1 to view the famous lighthouse at 938 Whitehead St., The Hemingway House at 907 Whitehead St., and Mile Marker 0, which stretches from Key West to upper Maine, located across from Zero Mile Art at 501 Whitehead St.
Located at 105 Simonton St. (24.560945 x -81.80457)
Free rum tasting, yep! Free distillery tour, yep. Located in the original Key West Coca-Cola bottling company building, this stop has reached #3 on our list. They offer mojito classes to train you to create and enjoy this refreshing summer drink. Take time to enjoy a little history and a libation.
More millionaires once resided in Key West than in New York City. The same is true for roosters and hens other than millionaires, but these chickens are treated as royalty as they own the lanes all across town.
On Duval Street, you can find art galleries, famous bars, live music, pharmacies, Key lime pie shops, and folks from all walks of life. Maybe even a celebrity or two. You can find food, music, and drink from one end of the road to the other. Just remember to watch where you step the later it gets into the early morning hours. It is said that Ernest Hemingway used the light beaming from the Key West lighthouse to find his way home on more than one occasion.
Located at Mallory Square Pier, 420 Wall St. (24.559151 x -81.806883)
Who calls evening drinks “sundowners?” Who has heard of “The Green Flash?” You are lucky because both can be chased here on the pier while waiting and enjoying the street performers and entertainers. Mallory Square is on the west side of town and is the perfect location for an evening with friends and drinks while watching the sunset. Remember not to look directly into the sun. Hold hands, laugh, and watch out not to hit your head on other people’s selfie sticks.
Do you have any Key West memories that you would like to share?
There I was, minding my own company, when I found myself in the middle of an electrical storm in the Dominican Republic, sitting in a brothel. Not by choice, but that’s where business was taking place. Let me explain the events that led me here, and the lady over my right shoulder playing Angry Birds on her mobile phone.
Song one: Wicked Game by Chris Isaak
I have been asked to sign a non-disclosure agreement twice in my Captain’s career. One was for a boat out of Hilton Head, South Carolina. The other was for a yacht and owner that I never saw.
A yacht representative contacted me to discuss a short-term contract as a fill-in Captain. My duties would be to babysit a new pleasure yacht and the crew for a long weekend in the Caribbean. We agreed on terms, and I was scheduled to fly out of Miami and into Santo Domingo in two weeks.
Song Two: Cherry Pie by Warrant
The day of the flight felt stress-free, and I was lucky enough to find an attractive Russian ballerina in the seat beside me for the flight. We chatted, and I tried to impress her with the few Russian words I picked up on trips to Moscow years past. While deboarding the plane and going through customs, she walked with me and chatted until we grabbed our bags, said our goodbyes, and went looking for our rides. My driver could not hide even if he tried. He was the tallest guy in the waiting area and had a printed sign that said, ” CAPTAIN G.”
Song Three: Pony by Ginuwine
Once in the vehicle, a new blacked-out Escalade, he notified me that there was a change in the plan due to the Yacht not being in port yet, and arrangements were made for me at a snazzy hotel downtown.
At the hotel, he told me that the owner said to enjoy my night and we would see how tomorrow morning goes. I noticed he was packing a pistol as he handed me my duffel bag. I have been around enough to know I was still on the good side of his hand cannon. We shook hands, and into the hotel, I went.
In the next post, I will explain how amber jewelry and Columbus’s ashes were within my reach on Day 2.
Aquatramp 